It’s never been easier to connect with people, and yet, genuine connection feels harder than ever.
I recently read that dating apps are a good example. They removed friction, made connection fast and abundant, and still, many are bleeding users. Why? Because what people thought they wanted — more options, more access — wasn’t what they were actually looking for.
They didn’t want more connection. They wanted better connection.
That same tension shows up in business every day.
“I don’t just want another option.”
“I don’t want more noise.”
“I want something that actually resonates.”
At the center of all of this is a simple question: are we truly connecting, or just creating the appearance of it?
For years, we’ve measured connection the same way we measured yield: volume. More impressions, more emails, more conversations. But just like farming taught us, yield alone doesn’t win. PROFITABILITY does.
Connection works the same way.
The number of touchpoints isn’t the key performance indicator. The quality of those interactions is.
People want to feel seen, safe, and energized. They want to feel respected and understood, even if very little is said. That’s how you know a real connection happened.
This is why authenticity matters so much, and why it can’t be automated. You can say the things caring people would say, but if it’s fabricated, people feel it immediately. You can’t fake authenticity. You can’t fake caring.
But the real constraint isn’t caring. It’s time.
Most people don’t have a limited capacity to care. They have a limited capacity to show that caring. Caring takes time to listen, to think, and to choose words intentionally. Time is finite, which means connection becomes a choice.
So how do you create better connections?
First, choose DEPTH over reach. Being louder doesn’t make you more influential. Relevance does.
Second, measure feelings and not just metrics. Did someone leave feeling understood or energized? That’s data.
Third, use language intentionally. If smart stays in your head and caring stays in your heart, nothing changes. Language is the valve that lets connection happen.
The future doesn’t belong to those who connect the most.
It belongs to those who connect best.
